Regulating Our Own Emotions

The Resilient Kid - A podcast by The Resilient Kid - By Ashley Costello

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FULL TRANSCTIPT - https://s3.membervaultcdn.com/theresilientpeople/Transcript---Regulating-Our-Own-Emotions.pdf?v=1701942991 Hello, and welcome back to the Resilient Kid podcast with me, Ashley Costello, psychotherapist of over 25 years. Today, we're going to talk about emotional regulation, but focusing on our emotional regulation as parents. Emotional Regulation Emotional regulation involves controlling the intensity of an emotional experience, dialing it down to ensure it's within our control. Building these skills not only positively impacts our mental health but also the relationships around us. As parents, our role is to regulate our kids' emotions by guiding them through what's happening, given that we have fully developed brains. But first, we need to regulate ourselves. Reasons for Triggers Childhood Triggers: Sometimes, triggers stem from our own childhood experiences, bringing up old feelings that may not be directly related to our kids' behavior. Parenting Reflection: Feeling triggered can also be a reflection of our own parenting skills, often influenced by the judgment we perceive from others during challenging situations. Addressing Triggers Identify Triggers: Take time to identify triggers by reflecting on situations that cause stress or loss of temper. Write them down for clarity. Listen to Your Body: Pay attention to physical signs of stress, such as clenched fists, sweating, or overthinking, as they can help identify when you feel under threat. Name Your Emotions: Naming the emotions you're experiencing helps develop emotional literacy and facilitates communication. Take Time Out: Communicate with your kids about needing time to calm down. Acknowledge your emotions and give yourself the space to respond thoughtfully. Deep Breathing: Engage in deep breathing exercises, inhaling through the nose and exhaling through the mouth, to quickly calm the fight-and-flight response. Additional Tips - Be kind to yourself and make amends if needed. - Consider taking up exercise to move stress hormones out of the body. - Water and nature are powerful stress relievers; spend time outdoors and use cool water on your wrists to regulate emotions. - Fill up your own cup by connecting with friends and family, ensuring you have resources and capacity to support your children. Conclusion Regulating our own emotions is crucial for effective parenting. Focusing on identifying triggers, listening to our bodies, and implementing strategies like deep breathing and self-care can make a significant impact. Remember to fill up your own cup so you can better support your kids emotionally. Closing Remarks I hope you found these insights valuable. In the next episode, we'll delve into kids' emotional regulation. As we approach the holiday season, take care and fill up your cup. Best of luck and lots of love from my family to yours. Until next time, take care! Useful Links Sign up to our newsletter Waitlist for “The Resilient Teen Book” Waitlist for "The Teen Coaches" Get “A Parents Guide To Raising A Resilient Kid” Book Social Links Facebook Instagram LinkedIn Pinterest Youtube Spotify Website