The Little Mermaid (2023)

What do you want? To hear our astute analysis of the last of the BIG remakes! What do we offer? Analysis of the last of the BIG remakes! What have you got? You've got your looks!! Your pretty face!!Disney have of course remade The Little Mermaid. You already know that, and you know that the Disness Boys' astute analysis is what you need in order to sort out all your cluttered thoughts about it. We see you, we hear you, and we've got you. Tune in. Why, what's the matter? Why are you looking at me like that? Oh, what, because it's really long? Listen buster, just because it's our longest episode doesn't mean it's our ACTUAL longest episode. Beauty and the Beast was longer, so was Frozen of course, have you all forgotten that so soon? It's just that I got all nervous and broke them up into bits. Not this time! This time, you'll just have to enter the 21st century and listen on a podcast app so it saves your place. You have my permission to listen to this in bursts of twenty, or ten, or even just five minutes. Whenever you go for a wee, set your phone down nearby and listen to however many minutes it takes you to wee. Do this every time and you'll be able to do LOADS of wees before the content is all dried up! Think of that, think how EXCITING a wee will start to be. But then the terror will set in, when you realise the episode has finally ended, and with it, your wees. You'll discover you've become so conditioned by this habit that you can no longer pass urine without hearing our voices. You'll have to start paying us a full-time wage just to be available to send you whatsapp recordings of our voices whenever you need a wazz, otherwise you'll develop a terrible kidney infection, which in the long run would cost more, wouldn't it. Think about it. So really, what you WANT to do, right, is just start paying us that wage now, before you start listening to this episode and it becomes too late. It only makes sense! So cough up!