39. "I Am Overwhelmed"

Feeling overwhelmed is something you might feel you have no control over. It’s such a heavy feeling that feels like it’s never going away, especially when you’re looking at your never-ending to-do list. I want you to know that you can choose to not feel overwhelmed, but not only that, you can create a life of contentment.   The 3-2-1 Rule 3 things you NEED to do today 2 things you WANT to do today 1 thing you LEAVE doing today   The Chief Complaint: “I Am Overwhelmed” I don’t know about you, but feeling overwhelmed is one of those feelings that sits in my chest and feels so slow. I feel like I’m never going to move through it, it’s just sitting there feeling so heavy. Some of the thoughts that lead to overwhelm are thinking about your to-do list, knowing you don’t have a break coming up, and so many more.   Mastering Your Emotions I want you to know that, just like you can other emotions, you have the power to choose not to feel overwhelmed. In this episode, I’m talking you through recognizing the signs of overwhelm, then feeling a more positive emotion, before going through a daily routine that will change your entire perspective. The fact is, we can learn to master our emotions. Some people find it easier than others, looking at you, perfectionists. But it is absolutely possible for us all to find a system that works for us. There are two types of emotional maturity: emotional adulthood and emotional childhood. We should all strive to exist in emotional adulthood, where our thoughts are more grounded and sensible. Emotional childhood is more immature, focusing on everything that’s going wrong in your life.   The 3-2-1 Rule When we realize that we can choose to step outside our feelings of overwhelm, we can enter a life of chronic contentedness and happiness. Part of this is setting more realistic goals for yourself and choosing not to overload your days. This is where my 3-2-1 rule comes into play. Take five minutes each morning to decide what you’ll focus on today. You’ll choose things that are outside of your “have to” duties like work and taking after your kids. Choose three things you absolutely need to do, like paying bills or cleaning the shower. Then choose two things you want to do, like going for a walk outside or cooking your favorite meal. Finally, pick one thing that you could do, but you choose to move to the next day. When you set more realistic expectations for yourself, your world will change. I promise. Now it’s time to celebrate the small things - it’s in this space that we learn those feelings of contentment.   Homework for Women Physicians What is one step you can take to get to your goal? Tell me something small you did today that you can celebrate. Let me know in the comments on the episode page.   In This Episode  What types of thoughts lead to overwhelm [2:45] Why you need to believe you have the power to change your thoughts and choose not to feel overwhelmed [8:00] What emotional adulthood is [12:00] How to create a life of contentment and happiness [17:30] How to implement the 3-2-1 rule [22:00] What happens when you start celebrating the small wins [27:15]   Quotes “Here’s the interesting thing about overwhelm: it moves slow. So it’s hard to get past the feeling of overwhelm because it just seems like it’s going to be there forever.” [2:06] “Doing the work on yourself is going to allow you to have this awareness of your emotions.” [11:30] “Everyone’s human. We will live in emotional childhood sometimes and we will live in emotional adulthood sometimes. It’s just the idea of choosing where you want to live.” [14:38] “The way that you can stay out of the overwhelm is to prioritize your day in a way that you’re willing to commit to doing certain things, enjoying certain things, and also leaving certain things and get comfortable with that.” [26:33]   Resources Mentioned Check out the full episode page here Join the Waitlist for G.O.A.L.S Society Find Life Coaching for Women Physicians Online Follow Dr. Ali Novitsky on Facebook | Instagram  Subscribe to Life Coaching for Women Physicians on Apple Podcasts Podcast production by the team at Counterweight Creative   Related Episodes Episode 22: “I Don’t Know How To Feel My Feelings” Episode 24: “I Don’t Know How To Feel Better” Episode 18: “I Am Afraid That I’m Burning Out” with Dr. Amelia Bueche